If I was independently wealthy, I would not be sitting here, correcting papers and stressing about my deadline.

I would have got up this morning, and taken my kids to the beach before it got busy. Then I would have gone to the shop and bought ingredients, and come home and baked carrot cake cupcakes with cream cheese frosting, for the barbeque I'll be attending briefly tonight.

If it wasn't for all this work, I'd be attending it less briefly, and would be able to relax more. As it is, I feel like I should bring the papers with me, but I've tried that before, it doesn't work - I can't refrain from joining in conversation (I really can't - I have to stop myself chiming in to strangers' conversations, in Tesco, on the bus... ).

As for the poor husband, his crappy job is getting crappier - there's a bank holiday sale, a 'marquee' sale, this weekend, which means he has to wear a yellow tshirt, and sell goods at cost price, so he gets no commission. Every one's away, so there aren't any customers - but the shop has still spent thousands on balloons, and marquees they put up inside (wtf?) and decorations no one's looking at. Frustrating. It feels like we've never had a weekend all together in the sun - usually it's sunny on the day he was working, then grey and pissy the day after for his day off. I'd love to just do family, sunshiney, weekendy things.

Meh! I'd better start doing the Lotto again, not hat that's worked out for me so far, I can't understand why I haven't won yet.

So off I go back to work - I'm going to compromise, guilt is propelling me to Argos later to buy a paddling pool, and I'll spend more than I should in M&S (can anyone resist?). The forecast says rain is coming at some point, I hope the weather holds out for a couple more days...