Tuesday, January 26, 2010

hetero-type-issues




Today a blogger I don't really know replied to a comment I'd left him with unexpectedly sweet sweetness. And it occurred to me, as I glowed a little, that I am completely undone by men being nice to me. *

It's lovely and affirming when women are nice to me too, but it doesn't make me tear up and feel quite so ... agh, I suspect, validated, as when men do it. Then it undoes me and builds me up again. Which is fairly pathetic, really, although I presume it all has to do with having had a father who was mostly undermining rather than validating, nasty rather than nice. Not all the time, and probably not with any intentional vindictiveness (...much) but ... clearly it was enough.

I must be nicer to my daughter. Lest she develop low self esteem-related loose affections in her teenagers years and becomes an ineffectual woman like her mother in later life.

*Yes, I rewrote the opening sentence, if you read it before. I knew it was badly structured when I wote it but I was lazy and left it, and then it bothered me too much to leave. See, I compulsively edit me, too. Perhaps not enough, says you. Well, ok, that's fair...

11 comments:

morgor said...

Hmm, i think that might just be the case for everyone and the opposite sex.

love me!

Jo said...

You know I love you!

Maxi Cane said...

I love you long time, Jo.

Looooooonnng time.

Raaarrrrr!

Jo said...

Hahaha, Maxi. I'm not sure what that means, but are you possibly expecting some low-self esteem grateful head now? Lol.

Martin said...

I'm not touching this one with a barge pole...

Mwa said...

I have it more with women. Remember that time you made me cry on gmail chat?

Jo said...

Aw, I do, Mwa. Kind maternal sympathy makes me cry as well :)

Ms. Moon said...

Same with me.

Maxi Cane said...

Head is head.

Bethany said...

This is a nice share. And the pic is perfect. I am more like this with women I think. But then again I don't really let myself get close enough to men, interact with them enough to get this kind of sweetness and feedback. So really, God knows what would happen. I am just alway sort of shocked when men express genuine feelings. I don't know how to take it in. Weird.

Jo said...

Profound, Maxi, profound.

Bethany, that reminds me of my sister. Who had two crappy father figures, not just one. Thanks for commenting on this one.