What does romantic mean to you?
Every so often I'm overtaken by a yearning to have a man who loves me best of all walk across a room, brush my hair off my neck and kiss me there. Because that was exactly what he wanted to do at that moment. I suppose I'm ashamed that that hasn't happened in, what, nearly two decades? I suppose that's what romance is - someone doing something for you, because they were thinking about it, all on their own. And they wanted to. If you're lucky, it ends up being the same thing you want done.
Flowers are always nice. Being somewhere when you weren't expected. Surprises. Moonlight and beaches. For some reason, kissing in the rain. After I had my first baby, my husband ran me a bath, and filled the room with candles. When I expressed gratitude and called him a good husband, he shook his head and said, 'I have no words.'
That was beautiful. But words go a long way too...
Ultimately, I think my childhood reading material informed my choice of what romantic is. Robin Hood rescues and derring do. Or breaking into the zoo before school to feed the wolves snared rabbits. It doesn't have to be about couples. There's romantic, the hearts and flowers and Paris kind, and then there's Romantic, with heroes, and sweeping plots, and swashbuckling, and triumph over adversity. I like it with highwaymen in it. People dressed in leather, and grand gestures :)
Life is pain, Princess.
Ah, feck it, Romance is pretty much the Princess Bride, I guess.
Break out the popcorn and icecream.
You keeled my father... Prepare to Die.
Ahhhhhh, Inigo.
So. Interactive today, please. What's romantic for you?
6 comments:
Oooooh, I really think the supposed definitions are what lead so many to be disappointed.
Romance is so much more than tight pants and a bit of swashbuckling. It's the 1 euro pez dispenser ET bought me the day she went into labour, it's the offer of a cup of tea in passing, it's letting you sleep that extra hour, it's watching a series about a serial killer together when you both know you'd be better served getting what sleep is going begging.
It's so so so much more.
Ah, don't miss my point. I mean, I put Gestures in there too.
In a marriage, it's about doing something for someone because you want to, as I said.
I haven't really explained the swashbuckling thing very well. I was trying to say, that's not about real life or relationships, really, just what moves me.
I have to admit though, I'm at a stage where I find the cups of tea more considerate than romantic, not sure it's the same.
I was wondering about that as I wrote... one of the best things Axel did for me after my babies came was make little comfy, suporting nests for me on the sofa or in the bed each evening, so I could feed them comfortably. Seeing the piled up cushions or turned down duvet was womderful, and it always felt ten times better than I could have done it. It's not like a Hired Sword was really what I needed in that situation.
But being a supportive, protective, involved father is heroic in its own way, I think.
That doing something because you want to thing is massive. You don't want to get a present because you'd be cross if you didn't get a present, if that makes any sense.
It's funny, when I try to define what romance is I can't. But I always know when its gone missing.
oh princess bride was the first video i watched with my husband!
I'd like a little more of the swooping and the swashbuckling as well. But I am very lucky in that I do get the cups of tea and the extra sleep. It's just that the stuff that's only for romance's sake are nice sometimes, too. On top of everything else. If I have to choose, though, I stick with the one I do have.
Hmm. I think I've been unclear. The swashbuckling doesn't so much apply to daily life or marriage. Obviously. It's more about an aprehension of what Romance is, than anything you'd list on a dating site. Y'know?
Lupin and Sirius and their friendship in the Prisoner of Azkaban is romantic. Shutting the door behind you and walking away into the evening in long full skirts and boots is romantic. That sort of thing.
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