Monday, August 29, 2011


Today I read someone's blog post about their happy, 15 year old marriage and the great sex they still have.

Can you say Damn, that was good? Can you say 15 years and still going strong?

I can. 

This was written by someone who feels the need to defend her lasting, monogamous marriage in a time and place that doesn't value or believe monogamy or long term relationships, or marriage - so I know it's not that she's gloating, she celebrating, promoting.

So it would be cringy and embarrassing if I commented, and said nope, I can say failed 17 year old relationship, I can say prematurely ended sex life and try as I might to fight it, this post makes me feel seven kinds of shitty and can you please not throw it in my face ever again.

So I don't, because, you know, I get that it's not about me and it's about something good, and I'm glad she has it, of course and my issues are my issues not anyone else's.

But that doesn't seem to stop me feeling shitty about it because I'm menstrual and everything emotional is overinflated this week. So I thought if I wrote about it maybe I'd be able to leave it alone. 


Birdie said...

I don't think it is ever helpful to compare our life to that of someone else.

"Don't waste your time on jealousy. Sometimes you're ahead, sometimes you're behind. The race is
long, and in the end, it's only with yourself."


Ms. Moon said...

I agree with Birdie. I could not have said it better myself.

Jo said...

Of course, but this is nothing to do with jealousy.

I'm not jealous. I know this woman and I am happy for her good marriage and sex life, I didn't mean to give the impression that I wasn't.

Just the only response I have to her challenge made me feel crappy and failed. It's not about her, it's about how I feel about myself.