Sunday, September 4, 2016

I thought about posting often this week. Or rather, I thought in blog post format, you know the way you do? At least, when I write, the way it works for me is to think it out first in my head, catch sentences there, explain things, set a tone.

Nothing made it to the page though, not funny, not sad. Ah, hormones, how I do not love thee.

I was thinking how useful it would be to spend a week in suspended animation once a month, but then I realised you'd just wake up with your period.

Unless there was some way to funnel the blood out of your suspended animation pod.

I think like this - do you know that? All day long I have to censor myself, so as not to disturb/alarm/disgust others.

I once wrote a comment on a pro-choice page about not everybody appreciating the life they have, not everybody being better off alive, and someone commented that it was the most miserable, cynical thing they'd ever read. I'm not sure if they understood me, exactly, or if it really was the most miserable, cynical thing they'd ever read.

I do have a problem with my thoughts swerving towards the negative... did you see that cute picture on facebook of teachers lining the kids up against the wall, and spraying them with water, leaving behind wonderful silhouettes of themselves on the wall? It was lovely, but I couldn't help but think of Nagasaki... Olivia said the same thing when I showed it to her, but I'm not sure that's a comfort, it just means I've passed on my grim side.

I'm not unoptimistic in many ways, in fact so far my life has taught me that it's pretty much my fatal flaw, optimism.

Anyway - I wish I could be locked away from humanity what amounts to nearly two weeks of the month. Which isn't very practical. I suppose a week would have to do.

I am in need of some spending cash again, universe. Could the banker please send some my way? I gave too much of mine to Italy by accident. And not like the last time when I asked for people to pray for my neighbour to stop chainsawing and to unite in hatred of fruit flies, and instead I got a plague of fruit flies, which may have amused the universe, but me, not so much. 

2 comments:

Ms. Moon said...

Oh Jo- never worry about how people will perceive your words. They are your words, coming from your very own unique heart and soul and brain.

Jo said...

What a lovely comment, Mary. Thank you. Sadly, my words get me into trouble no matter how many times I vow to shut my mouth and never say anything I shouldn't again.